How The West Was Won: Stacking Up The Pac-12 Expats In Week 10
How The West Was Won: Stacking Up The Pac-12 Expats In Week 10
Ashton Jeanty heads to Boise, Oregon goes to the Big House & more takeaways from the weekend
Happy Halloween to all you ghouls and goblins out there, with the spookiest day of the calendar year arriving just in time to scare the pants off the nation’s leading source of angst.
That source would be America’s amateur football coaches, who are either staring down a CFP bid or the prospect of lining deck chairs on their personal Titanic by firing everyone around them right now.
At the top end of the West’s NCAA hierarchy, you have the No. 1 team in the land, with Dan Lanning’s Oregon Ducks sitting at 8-0 and looking like a juggernaut in their new conference digs.
Conversely, in the bowels of the ship you have a bunch of visor-clad wannabe drill sergeants that are one step closer to a golden parachute with each passing loss to the Marylands and Rutgers of the world.
With all that in mind, it’s worth noting that our picks went undefeated against the moneyline last week (!), with yours truly going 13/13 with a sexy 12-1 mark against the spread in Week 9 of silly season.
With that in mind, lets get to the football wasteland stretched out in front of us this weekend, with plenty of opportunities to puke up momentum on the plastic playing fields of the left coast between now and Saturday night.
Last Week: 13-0 Straight-up/12-1 ATS
Season: 54-20 Straight-up/41-31 ATS
All Odds Provided By ESPN BET
No. 15 Boise State (6-1) vs. San Diego State (3-4) — 5 p.m. Pacific time Friday (FS1)
Spread: Boise State -23.5
Our Pick: Boise State wins, 38-16
I made sure to do what any good husband with a non-sports fan wife does last Friday to watch our nation’s leading source of backfield energy play in Las Vegas — pulling up YouTube TV on my phone so I could watch Ashton Jeanty rip UNLV’s heart out of its chest while we enjoyed Bake Off on Netflix.
My efforts were rewarded after a slow start for the junior from Florida, as Jeanty overcame stout resistance from Barry Odom’s UNLV defensive front seven to finish the night with 128 yards and the game-clinching touchdown in a 29-24 victory in the House That Mark Davis Stole.
This week, Boise State gets the unenvious task of playing in the bleary hours of Friday night on FOX’s ugly stepchild of a network.
Luckily for all involved, it’s supposed to be a balmy 53 degrees in Boise come Friday night, though there’s a shot at rain, which means the Broncos should run the ball 90 times in a row to be safe.
Don’t be surprised if Jeanty gets to spend the second half on the sidelines with a stiff drink in his hand (Gatorade, of course), with Boise State rolling over the Aztecs in the Treasure Valley this week.
Stanford (2-6) at NC State (4-4) — 9 a.m. Pacific time Saturday (ACC Network)
Spread: NC State -10
Our Pick: NC State wins, 28-17
America’s finest purveyor of being an 11-man punching bag heads east this week to provide some relief to a banged-up NC State squad.
That’s because Dave Doeren’s bunch get to host the Fighting Liberal Economists of Stanford on the heels of surviving a one-point win over the Cardinal’s East Bay rival.
In their past five game, NC State has seen their starting QB retire from the sport, with the cherry on top of losing two home games to Syracuse (!) and Wake Forest (!!) by a combined margin of 10 points.
This weekend, the Wolfpack get back on track when the Cardinal come to Raleigh, thanks in large part to the latter’s inability to play functional football this fall.
No. 1 Oregon (6-0) at Michigan (5-3) — 12:30 p.m. (CBS/Peacock)
Spread: Oregon -14.5
Our Pick: Oregon wins, 31-10
The natty hangover is something strong in Ann Arbor this fall, as first-year head coach Sherrone Moore has discovered that football’s a lot harder when you can’t cheat anymore.
That’s exactly what fate has bestowed upon the Wolverines, however, as UM enters the stretch run 5-3 overall with losses to heavyweights like Jedd Fisch (lol) and Bret Bielema (lol again).
This week, the Wolverines host the Ducks for the first time since a spritely chap from New England named Chip Kelly waxed their backsides on national TV.
While Dennis Dixon is long gone, the pain that Oregon brought down on the Big House way back in 2007 will be felt yet again by Wolverines football enthusiasts come Saturday afternoon.
Arizona (3-5) at UCF (3-5) — 12:30 p.m. Pacific time Saturday (FS1)
Spread: UCF -6
Our Pick: UCF wins, 24-10
I’ve waxed poetic (or so I’d like to think) ad nauseum this year about the miserable mess that is Brent Brennan’s Arizona Wildcats in this space, so I’m done beating that dead horse.
Instead, I’m going to take this space to laugh out loud about UCF’s decision to ax America’s leading source of buyout money — that being professional coaching scapegoat Ted Roof.
(See the image below for more context…)
That, dear reader, is Roof’s résumé, giving Jedd Fisch a run for his money when it comes to being the No. 1 castoff in college & professional football in the year of our lord 2024.
Sadly for UCF, firing Roof won’t put out the fire that plagues the Knights’ football program, but a salve is coming to the House of The Mouse, with Arizona’s anemic offense making the 2,000-mile trek to Orlando to lay down and die on Saturday afternoon.
UCLA (3-5) at Nebraska (5-3) — 12:30 p.m. Pacific time Saturday (Big Ten Network)
Spread: Nebraska -6
Our Pick: Nebraska wins, 27-10
The Fighting Men of Corn nearly made America’s dreams come true inside The Shoe last weekend before wilting like an ear left on the husk in the early fall.
That’s because Nebraska put the fear of god into a bloated Ohio State squad (looking at you, Chip) before blowing it in the end and snatching defeat from victory’s doorstep.
In the end, Nebraska lost that contest, 21-17, though they did inspire the funniest outburst of fans soiling their diapers this season, when Ohio State’s future mall cop laden student section threw cans, cups and Cheez Whiz containers at the field in the fourth quarter.
This weekend, Nebraska gets that elusive sixth victory to put the Men of Corn back into the sport’s postseason, Bruining UCLA’s lives once again.
Arizona State (5-3) at Oklahoma State (3-5) — 4 p.m. Pacific time Saturday (FS1)
Spread: ASU -3.5
Our Pick: Oklahoma State wins, 38-31
America’s finest purveyor of mullets and One America News paraphernalia has the Pokes in big trouble this fall, with Mike Gundy staring down the barrel of a 3-5 record after entering the season with a win total over/under of 8.5.
Hopefully if you bet on such things you took the under, as Oklahoma State can only win nine games if they find a way to schedule Oklahoma between their season finale and whatever bottom-rung bowl game they play in this season.
While such creativity in scheduling isn’t impossible by any stretch, we’re going to go with the under in Stillwater this fall, though I do think Ollie Gordon II will haunt ASU’s dreams come Saturday evening.
Fresno State (5-3) vs. Hawaii (3-5) — 4 p.m. Pacific time Saturday (No TV)
Spread: Fresno State -13.5
Our Pick: Fresno State wins, 34-20
It’s been a whirling dervish of a football season for the Fighting ‘Bows, with a 21-point victory over Nevada on Saturday snapping Hawaii’s three-game losing streak to teams like San Diego State, Boise State and Washington State.
It appears that Hawaii has a case of the ‘States,’ with the ‘Bows standing no shot against the Mountain West’s states rights caucus.
Sadly for Tommy Chang’s team, they play another fake state this weekend, as the Fresno State Bulldogs enter off two straight wins with an eye towards reaching a bowl game under interim head coach Tim Skipper against our beloved ‘Bows on Saturday.
USC (4-4) at Washington (4-4) — 4:30 p.m. Pacific time Saturday (Big Ten Network)
Spread: USC -2.5
Our Pick: USC wins, 27-24
There’s a “Choose Your Fighter” level of schadenfreude on the line in Seattle this weekend as future Dallas Cowboys buyout recipient Lincoln Riley and the Human Visor (Jedd Fisch) tangle in the Emerald City on Saturday night.
Both USC & Washington enter the battle royal at 4-4 with lol (or lmao, even) levels of ineptitude, including such highlights as USC losing to Maryland and Minnesota and Washington forgetting how clocks work against Washington State.
Come the weekend, I’m going with USC QB Miller Moss to do enough to get the Trojans back above .500, setting the stage for another trip down The Five to San Diego come bowl season.
Colorado State (5-3) at Nevada (3-6) — 5 p.m. Pacific time Saturday (CBS Sports Network)
Spread: CSU -2.5
Our Pick: CSU wins, 13-10
There’s a scene in the baseball classic known as “Bull Durham” where the beleaguered skipper comes into the clubhouse and tries to fire up the club by bleating out the statement; “What’s our record? 8-16. How did we ever win eight? It’s a miracle? It’s a miracle!”
That refrain pretty much sums up CSU football in 2024, as the Rams have somehow won four of five despite scoring 25.4 points per game, thanks to playing the Mountain West’s little sisters of the collective poor.
That trend continues this weekend when the Nevada Wolf Pack host my beloved Rams, fresh off getting their asses waxed by Hawaii, 34-13.
While the Rams’ offense resembles a slice of havarti left out in the Colorado sun for a month, they have more than enough firepower on both sides of the ball to survive a battle of the weakest links in the glorified truck stop that is Mackay Stadium come Saturday evening.